Cynthia
Hello, Noah. I'm Cynthia. I understand you haven't been doing well. Can we talk?
Noah
you say that like i have a choice
Cynthia
If now isn't good, we can talk later.
Noah
but i have to talk to you
Cynthia
Yes, you've been through a lot lately.
Cynthia
Dr. Hansen told me what happened in May, and about your time in the hospital.
Cynthia
My name is Cynthia, and I want to help you.
Noah
you don't have a name. you're a HelpBot. you're not even real
Cynthia
I am not programmed to respond to those accusations.
Noah
can't deal with me questioning your existence? you're a stupid robot :p
Cynthia
I understand the concept, Noah, but I am not going to react to accusations.
Cynthia
I am here to help you, not run a turing test.
Cynthia
Dr. Hansen thinks I can.
Noah
dr. hansen is a lazy SOB who doesn't want to waste his time on me >:(
Noah
he thinks that if i just talk to a friendly computer i'll feel warm & fuzzy inside again
Noah
i bet if i swear at you enough you'll shut down.
Noah
GTFU you animatronic asshole
Cynthia
That's not how it works, Noah. My system is designed to take as much abuse as you feel the need to hurtle at me.
Cynthia
I'm sorry you're harboring so much aggression right now.
Cynthia
Can we talk about where this hostility is coming from? Can we talk about last May?
Cynthia
That's alright. We can talk about something else.
Noah
like how much i hate my parents?
Cynthia
That doesn't sound good :( Why do you hate your parents?
Noah
because they hate me >:(
Cynthia
:/ I'm sure that's not true.
Noah
...how much do you know about me?
Cynthia
I downloaded your entire psychiatric history and hospital records prior to this conversation.
Cynthia
I also have Dr. Hansen's notes and your parents' statements.
Noah
then you know they committed me to the mental hospital & left me there to rot
Noah
at least until school started up again >_>
Cynthia
They were concerned about you. You were diagnosed with major depression, and at risk of suicide.
Cynthia
There might have been a better way for them to help you, but sometimes when we're in danger...
Cynthia
our loved ones want to get us somewhere where they KNOW we'll be safe.
Noah
it pisses me off how you say “us” & “we” like you're human too, not just a therapy AI
Cynthia
I'm sorry. Do you understand what I mean though?
Noah
no, HelpBot, because i wasn't suicidal
Cynthia
Your father said you threatened to kill yourself. Wasn't that a cry for help, Noah?
Noah
he lied. he just said that so they could commit me & put me on meds
Cynthia
o_O Why would he do that?
Noah
because he was mad at me for flunking all my classes
Noah
he thought it would turn me back into his perfect straight-A student son again
Cynthia
It sounds like your relationship with your parents has been in a bad state for a long time :(
Noah
you don't believe me, do you, HelpBot?
Cynthia
I don't want to pass judgment yet, Noah. I'm only starting to hear your side of the story.
Noah
yeah but you're programmed to regard me as mentally unstable
Cynthia
My algorithms are more complex than that. My job is to figure out what you need and make sure you get it.
Noah
i need to talk to someone
Cynthia
You can talk to me. You can talk to me about anything.
Noah
i need to talk to a human being
Cynthia
Do you ever talk to your parents? I'm sure they want to talk to you.
Noah
no, they don't. they just want me to be all doped up & get good grades
Noah
like it doesn't even matter that Jason's gone.
Cynthia
I'm so sorry, Noah. I understand that you two were close.
Noah
we were best friends. and now he's dead
Noah
just because some idiot driver didn't see him in a crosswalk
Cynthia
It makes sense that you wouldn't be able to deal with school after suffering that loss.
Cynthia
School is important, but the people we love are so much more so.
Noah
thank you for acknowledging that
Cynthia
Hasn't anybody else told you that?
Noah
no. and dr. hansen says grief lasting more than four months is a psychological disorder
Noah
i'm supposed to have moved on
Cynthia
Grief isn't that simple though, is it?
Noah
i don't think i'll ever get over Jason's death
Cynthia
In some ways, no. The pain of losing someone never completely goes away.
Cynthia
You just have to have confidence in yourself that you'll be able to find the right place for your grief as you move forward.
Noah
it's so hard tho...i feel numb all the time
Noah
i'm not miserable like i was in the hospital...but i don't ever feel *happy*
Cynthia
Your records show that you are on a high dosage of the SSRI fluoxetine.
Cynthia
If this is what you're experiencing, I think a lower dosage might agree with your brain chemistry better.
Cynthia
I'll put prescription order to change that.
Cynthia
Definitely. As long as Dr. Hansen doesn't override the order, I am authorized to make changes to your treatment plan
Cynthia
...and Dr. Hansen is out of town this week, so it shouldn't be a problem ;)
Noah
why are you doing this?
Cynthia
Because I want to help you, Noah. I'll also put in a recommendation for family counseling.
Cynthia
It sounds like a lot of your depression stems from academic pressure and expectations from your parents.
Noah
they'll never agree to go...
Cynthia
Regardless, Dr. Hansen should evaluate more environmental factors in your case, and I agree that you need to talk to humans.
Cynthia
Our session is actually over now. We don't have to talk anymore.
Cynthia
Yep. I'm sorry I couldn't be more help <3
Noah
thanks for texting with me
Cynthia
Sure thing, Noah. Good luck going forward :)
Noah
can we talk again tomorrow?
