Nikki
Elle, I’m telling you this as your best friend…
Nikki
This is a really bad idea.
Her words come through the phone loud and clear…
Because I’ve been hooking up with Tom Allen for exactly 1 month…
And tonight, I’m going to surprise him.
I place one final balloon by his door…
Then adjust the “Happy Anniversary” sign I taped to the headboard.
Elle
I know what you’re thinking.
Elle
And I know Tom and I aren’t “official” or anything.
Elle
But once he knows how I feel…
Elle
All that is going to change.
I hear footsteps down the hall.
Elle
Gotta go! He’s here!
I quickly hang up the phone and jump on Tom’s bed.
And the speed of my already racing heart rate ratchets up a notch.
When his blonde head finally appears, I yell…
Tom jumps back at the sound of my voice.
He looks at me, then around the room, in shock.
Tom
What are you doing here??
I climb off the bed and give him my biggest smile.
Elle
I wanted to surprise you.
Elle
I know we don’t usually see each other during the week…
Elle
But I thought it’d be okay to make an exception.
Elle
You know, since today is our 1-month and all.
Both proclaim the happy message.
The look on his face morphs into one of horror…
And I hear laughter behind him.
It’s then that I notice he isn’t alone.
His frat brothers are here too.
And they all seem to be enjoying the drama.
My smile starts to falter.
Whose face has gone hard.
Tom
Elle, we’re not dating.
Tom
I know I made that clear.
Tom
I told you I wasn’t looking for a relationship.
Elle
Right, but I thought…
I feel everyone’s gaze on me…
And their laughter echoes all around me.
Tom goes to the headboard and rips off the sign.
Tom
Whatever you thought was wrong.
Tom
I call you on the weekends, you come over…
He swipes his hand over the bed…
Pushing the scattered rose petals onto the floor.
Tom
Are you serious with all this crap?
My lower lip starts to tremble.
Humiliation burns through my veins like battery acid.
I thought this thing between Tom and me was different.
I thought we really connected.
I was misreading the situation…
Tom rolls his eyes at my expression.
Tom
You know, I heard around campus you were a little nuts.
Tom
Apparently, I should have listened.
I start backing toward the door…
Knowing what’s coming next.
I turn and run from the room.
I hate those two stupid words.
I’ve heard them time and time again…
I’m so flustered on my way out…
That I bump into a tall redhead.
Steve, I think his name is.
When I see the look in his eyes…
I don’t stop to apologize.
Because if there’s anything worse than rejection or laughter…
I’ve been hiding in the library for hours.
I didn’t want to chance running into Tom or any of his frat brothers.
So when I feel a tap on my shoulder…
I nearly jump out of my skin.
I look up and lock eyes with Steve.
The tall redhead I bumped into last night.
Steve
Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.
He pulls something out of his back pocket.
Steve
I think this is yours.
Fear grips me hard and fast when I see what’s he’s holding.
A comprehensive journal of anything and everything Tom.
I snatch it from his hand.
Elle
Where did you get this?!
Oh god, I must have left it there last night.
My eyes fill with humiliated tears.
Elle
I hope you all had another laugh at my expense!
Elle
Now just leave me alone.
But to my surprise, he doesn’t leave.
And pulls out the chair across from me.
Once seated, he leans over with a soft whisper.
Steve
The only person that saw it was me.
Steve
I didn’t show anyone.
Stunned, I look up at him.
He crosses his arms casually on the table…
But his expression is tight.
Steve
I think you’ve suffered enough.
Steve
And if they saw that notebook…
Elle
So you looked at it?
Steve
I didn’t know what it was at first.
Steve
To be honest, I still don’t.
Steve
Is it some kind of stalker journal?
It’s not the first time I’ve been called a stalker.
But today, I’m in no mood.
Elle
Oh my god, I’m NOT stalking him.
Elle
It’s my Tom notebook.
Elle
A list of his likes and dislikes…
Elle
And other things I learned about him over the course our relationship.
Elle
So I know when I shouldn’t text him.
Elle
I like to document my crushes.
Realizing how it all sounds.
Lovesick, like Nikki says?
Steve leans back in his chair…
Steve
You’re kind of intense.
His words make my eyes fill with tears again.
Elle
Is there something else you need?
Elle
Because if not, I’d like to go back to studying.
He taps his fingers on the table.
His hands are covered in freckles…
Steve
Did Tom lead you on?
Steve
I mean, did he ever tell you he liked you?
Steve
Did he ever text you?
Steve
Like, to ask about your day?
Steve
Did he ever seem interested in anything other than hooking up?
Why is it so easy for everyone else to see the truth?
He turns his palms face-up on the table.
Steve
Then why would you do something like you did last night?
And there’s the million-dollar question.
Maybe it’s because I need to get it out…
Or maybe it’s because all Nikki had to say was…
But I find myself telling him the truth.
I look down at my hands, embarrassed.
Elle
I’ve always been this way.
Elle
My friends say I’m in love with the idea of love.
Elle
I just want to find “the one,” you know?
Steve
There’s no such thing.
Elle
How can you say that?
Steve
I grew up with divorced parents.
Steve
I’ve seen my buddies go through terrible relationships.
Steve
None of them end well.
Steve
Because love is fleeting.
Steve
That’s why I keep as far away from all that crap as I can.
Elle
If you go by that logic…
Elle
You’re going to miss out.
Steve
How is that search for love working out for you?
I’m clearly going about everything the wrong way.
I suddenly find I’m envious of HIM.
Elle
I should be more like you.
Elle
God, I don’t even know how to be friends with a guy.
Elle
Not without imagining a future with him.
I put my head in my hands.
Steve
I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.
Steve
Besides, all hope is not lost.
Steve
If you want, I can help you.
Steve
I’ll show you that you CAN be just friends with a guy.
I know he can see the confusion in my gaze.
He gives me a friendly smile.
Elle
Why would you do that?
Elle
What’s in it for you?
Steve
It’s just because I feel bad.
Steve
Last night was brutal.
Steve
And I want to help you out.
I stare at his hand again.
And Steve returned my Tom journal.
He’s already proven he’s not a jerk like the rest of them.
I reluctantly reach forward…
