Tasha
You picked a really bad day to skip school.
Melanie
My head’s been in the toilet all morning.
Tasha
Well, prepare your stomach. I don’t have good news.
Melanie
Is someone pooping in all the lockers again?
Tasha
Worse. Mr. Donaldson assigned our final project today.
Melanie
WHAT!? That’s not supposed to start until May!
Tasha
Wanted to take us by surprise.
Tasha
He said: “In the real world, you don’t always have time to prepare.”
Melanie
But we’re right in the middle of midterms!
Melanie
What is he thinking!?
Tasha
We were assigned partners…
Melanie
AND? Who am I with??
Tasha
Are you still by the toilet?
Melanie
Oh god. Who is it?
Tasha
Yes. I’m sorry, Mel.
Melanie
BUT I HATE BEN WATSON!!
Melanie
Everyone knows that!
Tasha
Everyone except Donaldson, apparently.
Melanie
I’ll talk to him. He’s got to change his mind.
Tasha
I don’t think that’s going to work.
Tasha
We all have partners already.
Melanie
The babies were already handed out?!
Tasha
Yup. They’re pretty lifelike.
Melanie
OMG! This is a nightmare!
Tasha
It’s only a couple weeks. You can get through it.
Tasha
Ben was tossing the baby like a football in the hallway after class.
Melanie
Of course he was 🙄
Melanie
I wish I could say that surprises me.
Melanie
BUT TYPICAL BEN!!
Tasha
I’d reach out to him if I were you.
Tasha
This project is 30% of our grade…
Tasha
You should make sure he’s taking it seriously.
Melanie
Ben Watson doesn’t take anything seriously.
Melanie
All he does is goof around 🤦♀️
5 minutes later, I text Ben.
Melanie
Hey Ben. We need to talk about this project.
Ben
If it isn’t the mother of my child.
Melanie
Don’t call me that.
Melanie
NO. Cut the crap.
Melanie
We need to figure out how we’re going to get through these 2 weeks.
Ben
First, I’d like an apology.
Ben
And so would Lemon Head.
Melanie
Who is Lemon Head?
Ben
Pshh, some mom you are.
Ben sends me a picture of their baby.
Melanie
WTF is it wearing?!
Ben
It’s not an “IT”. It’s a SHE.
Ben
And she’s wearing my dog’s Halloween costume from a few years ago.
Ben
Can’t exactly have her walking around naked, can we?
Melanie
So you dressed her like a TACO?!
Ben
Hey, I’m doing the best I can. It isn’t easy being a single parent.
Ben
Which brings me back to my original point…
Ben
You owe me and Lemon Head an apology.
Ben
I had to take care of her all by myself today.
Ben
Never took you for the absentee type, Mel.
Melanie
I had no idea this project was starting today!
Melanie
And for your information, I have a stomach bug.
Melanie
And talking to you certainly isn’t helping!
Ben
You should try being nicer.
Ben
You’re not making a good impression on Lemon Head.
Melanie
WOULD YOU STOP CALLING IT LEMON HEAD?!
Ben
You’ve seen the pic. Her head looks remarkably like a lemon.
Melanie
Stop. Donaldson needs to know we’re taking this seriously!
Melanie
I can’t afford a bad grade.
Ben
What’s a bad grade to you again?
Melanie
Meet me tomorrow at Cafe Luna at 7am.
Melanie
Bring the project outline. We need to get a schedule figured out.
Ben
Is that all we are to you?
